Jan

7

When Did You Come Out to Your Family and How Did It Go?

Filed Under Coming Out 

Genia: I called my sister hoping I would be able to find a contact number for my aunt who had been an out lesbian for over 25 years. I wanted her advice on how to come out. While talking to my sister, I learned two of my female cousins had recently come out. I then said, “Really? Guess who else in the family is a lesbian?” When I told her I was gay, she said, “For real? Don’t play with me!” I think it was just a shock because I didn’t look like the other lesbians in the family; I’m a bit more femme than they are. There was no drama, though. No one’s said anything negative about my sexual orientation, at least not that I know of.

Andrea: I came out to my family in 1998. I told my brother several months before my parents and my sister several months after my parents. My parents were pretty surprised by my news and my mom struggled (and still struggles I think) with me being a lesbian. I gave them information on going to groups like PFLAG which they did attend once but never returned. I remember a lot of tears and my mom needing to go outside and gather herself at one point.

Comments

4 Responses to “When Did You Come Out to Your Family and How Did It Go?”

  1. Lachlan on January 7th, 2010 1:26 pm

    I was outed inadvertently, as my GF at the time kissed me- and her mom came around the corner unexpected (we thought she was in the shower). Her mom melted down, called my mom, and made a humongous deal of it. She then locked herself in the bathroom threatening suicide. Good times.

    /sarcasm

    When my Dad found out after this incident, he didn’t speak to me for three months. We eventually reconciled. No one else in my family made a big deal of it.

  2. Lachlan on January 7th, 2010 1:26 pm

    Oh, and I was 16 (1990) when all this happened.

  3. Annie on January 7th, 2010 1:58 pm

    I WISH I could come out to my family. I’m not lesbian, but I am however bisexual. My family isn’t understanding in the least. They claim to be very religious… they’re not. Regardless, if I were to come out.. they wouldn’t accept it. After sitting through a 2 hour sermon from them, they’d disown me if I didn’t “change”. They’re convinced anyone who isn’t hetero will go straight to hell, no questions asked. :\

    I’m 27, I’ve known that I’ve been interested in girls also since high school. But somehow, I think I always knew.

  4. Bailey on January 8th, 2010 12:51 pm

    I was on the phone with a girl I was dating about 6 months ago. I saw my mom on the couch. I looked at her and said “You know I’m gay right?” She said “Huh.” and that was that. She casually mentioned it to my step dad while she was on the phone with him. I told my oldest sister a few weeks later and she was cool with it as well. My little brother is very uncomfortable with it but he tries not to comment.

    My other siblings have probably assumed by now but I’ve never confirmed it. I’ll tell my dad when I’m in a serious relationship (or maybe when he’s drunk. Ha.) and I’ll just let my step mom figure it out on her own.

    I’m 18.

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